Full Circle

For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord. As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts (Isaiah 55:8-9, NIV).

It was Sunday afternoon, and we were finishing up preparations for an early supper. It was a time I’d been looking forward to all week as my twin brother, visiting from out of town, and I worked to prepare the meal together. With 2020 bringing COVID-19 and a new baby for their family, I hadn’t been able to spend any substantial time with him in almost a year. Sunday provided a fun opportunity for us to work together to prepare a meal for our parents and a couple of close friends who’d be joining us. After some discussion about the menu, a stop by Fresh Market, and an averted potential disaster when I realized I didn’t have an Instant Pot to cook the short ribs, we were finishing up preparations for the meal. While standing at the sink, drying a couple of dishes, I spun around to see my kitchen filled with people I love. In that moment, I was filled with gratitude and reminded just how often God brings things full circle in my life.

One of my favorite quotes from Joyce Meyer is this: “We live life forward, but we understand it backwards.” It might sound cliché to you, but for me, it’s a simple truth that reminds me to call to mind God’s faithfulness in my life when I’m wrestling with why He is allowing certain things to happen. Why did I grow apart from that friend? Why did my brother have to move away? Will I ever have a family of my own, Lord? I think we can all agree we’ve found ourselves questioning God before. For me it’s often from a child-like, wondering perspective. On occasion, though, it’s from a place of anger and frustration brought on by a human perspective that prevents me from seeing the full picture. When things in life don’t go as I expect or would like, you might find me, literally or figuratively, marching around my house demanding God to explain himself. I can imagine Him sitting on the throne of heaven, looking down and being patient with me, like a loving Father would, allowing me to have my fit and waiting for me to “get over it,” so to speak. Any of you out there who are parents can probably relate!

The year 2020 has been challenging for all of us. So many things have caused us to want to throw a fit! Canceled events, virtual learning, loss of employment, social and political unrest, among many other things, have defined much of the past year. This entire year has been a great example of how difficult it can be when we can’t see the whole picture. When we rang in the new year on January 1, nobody could have predicted all of the instability, frustration, and turmoil that has been part of our lives for the past ten months. We’re all exhausted. We need a break. We’re ready for life to “get back to normal.”

When we’re going through something difficult, not seeing the whole picture can be tough. However, when I find my head and heart drifting in the direction of questioning God and trying to comprehend His ways, I’m learning to draw to mind verses 8–9 from Isaiah 55: For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord. As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts. When I meditate on those verses and allow them to settle into my heart, I’m reminded of the sovereignty of our God. Even when we can’t see it and our brains can’t comprehend how He will bring to pass the desires of our hearts, I remind myself that He has a very good and specific plan for my life. And He has one for yours, too.

This message was recently reinforced when, while cleaning my house last week, I hit shuffle on my favorite playlist on Apple Music. The song “Prophesy Your Promise” by Bryan and Katie Torwalt began to play. If you’ve never heard it, I urge you to check it out. This song has always spoken to my heart in a significant way, and my favorite line, by far, from the song is this:

When I only see in part, I will prophesy Your promise I believe You, God ‘Cause You finish what You start, I will trust You in the process I believe You, God

Many days I need to listen to that on repeat. It is by God’s design that we can only see in part. He is such a good Father that He lovingly chooses to reveal things to our hearts in His perfect timing, according to what He knows we need and can handle in the moment. I don’t know about you, but I sometimes find myself falling into the trap of believing that I know better than God about what’s best for my life. I’m so thankful God is good, merciful, and loving enough to rescue me from my own mess. Like those beautiful lyrics remind us, we just have to trust and believe Him for the plan He has for our lives.

When I look back on that Sunday in my kitchen, it didn’t look as though I thought it might have a year prior. You see, my friend who was stirring gravy had only been part of my life for just over a year. Ironically enough, it was an inability to do that exact task due to a painful shoulder injury that had brought her into my life! Fast forward just over a year, and she’s standing in my kitchen, with my family and me, performing that very task (pain-free, I might add!). Over the past year, her friendship has become a pillar of strength, stability, and support in my life, and that was exactly what I didn’t even realize I needed. She has walked with me through faltering friendships, work frustrations, and the pain of silence as I continue to wait for God to answer a specific prayer. Her friendship has blessed me more than I deserve.

When I recently reflected on how God brought this friendship full circle in my life, I was reminded that if He had given me all of what I thought I wanted, I might have missed out on that beautiful moment that day. When we open our eyes, ears, and hearts to hearing the Lord and being obedient to what He is calling us to do, we allow Him space in our lives to carry out His good and perfect plan. Though we may not understand what He is doing, we are called to trust and remember that we serve a sovereign God who, no matter what life throws our way, works all things together for good.