Hoping, Not Holding

Take delight in the Lord, and he will give you your heart’s desires (Psalm 37:4, NLT).

Several weeks ago, I was watching a UK men’s basketball game with some friends. If you’ve been following the season so far this year, it hasn’t quite lived up to expectations. It’s an interesting experience being a die-hard, lifelong UK fan. Year in and year out, regardless of the circumstances, the expectation is often that we will lose fewer than ten games, win the SEC regular season, win the SEC tournament, and culminate the season by winning a national championship. Reasonable, right? Well, not exactly. But, if you’ve been a Kentucky fan for long at all, you’ll understand that, though it may not always be reasonable or rationale, it’s generally the standard to which the program is held. Enter the 2020–2021 season where we find our team sitting at 3–6, far below the mark anyone, including every player, coach, and member of the staff, would have expected. Though the season has yet to measure up to our lofty expectations, I, like many other Kentucky fans, still find myself tuning in to watch every single second of every game.

During a recent game, the last minute was ticking away. Knowing a loss was inevitable, I arose from the couch to use the restroom and get a snack. As I stood up, my friend paused the game until I returned to finish watching the last minute. She knows I love the game and usually hate to miss a second, but in this particular instance, I chuckled. I remember saying out loud, “I’m not sure why you paused the game. It’s pretty much over. I’ll watch and hope for a miracle comeback, but I’m not holding my breath.” Don’t get me wrong; I am not a pessimistic UK fan. But I will say that statement, more than in previous years, seems to have defined our season thus far. Though that game ended in a loss, no matter how the season goes, I will always cling to the hope that our boys will eventually get their act together to meet and exceed expectations for the season. I remembered thinking to myself, without hope, what fun is being a fan anyway?

When I paused and thought about that statement, it became immediately clear to me that my walk with Jesus can be defined the same way. Much like we do for our favorite sports teams, we often allow ourselves to create lofty expectations of how our lives should go as followers of Jesus. We develop an idea, create an image in our minds, or set up a particular system of beliefs, and we expect the Lord to make it all happen according to our timeline. As is the case with many Kentucky basketball fans, we often have little patience and demand something come to fruition before it’s had adequate time to develop. And many times, without much patience in waiting, we start complaining, give up hope, stop watching, and may end up missing out on experiencing the beauty of victory when it comes in an unexpected way.

We all have things in our lives we’re hoping and longing for. Restoration of a relationship. Having a family. Starting that business. Staying at home. Though the desires of our hearts may be different, and thus the environment around us will look different as well, we are all walking the same path in this life. We have hopes and dreams we pray the Lord will bring to fruition. Psalm 37:4 reminds us: Take delight in the Lord, and he will give you your heart’s desires (NLT). What a beautiful verse that gets quoted often as a reminder that the Lord is good and He will fulfill His promises. Yet, as the commentary from this particular study Bible reminds me, “take delight in the Lord means aligning with the Lord’s way in order to enjoy him”1.

What happens when the desires of our hearts don’t align with the Lord’s will for our lives? Whew. That can be a tough pill to swallow. On many occasions, I’ve found myself, as I’m sure you have, too, wondering why the Lord hasn’t answered my prayer. I’ve cried out to God, questioned Him, even been angry with Him. When He doesn’t answer as promptly as I would like, it feels as though I’m invisible and, at times, has left me wondering if I’m somehow being punished. I need only to turn the pages of my Bible to Psalm 13 to realize that I’m not alone in feeling this way.

1O Lord, how long will you forget me? Forever? How long will you look the other way? 2How long must I struggle with anguish in my soul, with sorrow in my heart every day? How long will my enemy have the upper hand? 3Turn and answer me, O Lord my God! Restore the sparkle to my eyes, or I will die. 4Don’t let my enemies gloat, saying, “We have defeated him!” Don’t let them rejoice at my downfall. 5But I trust in your unfailing love. I will rejoice because you have rescued me. 6I will sing to the Lord because he is good to me (Psalm 13, NLT; emphasis mine).

This Psalm, written by young David before he was king, has comforted my heart and soul many times as I’m reminded that, regardless of my waiting, I will continue to hope in the Lord without holding on to what I believe is best for my life. Have you ever watched a Kentucky basketball game with someone that has all the answers and swears he or she is more adequately qualified to make decisions and are sure they know the keys to victory? I certainly have, and I can tell you, it can be more than frustrating at times, and often, downright annoying. I’m sure I have been guilty of this before as well. Now, imagine how Jesus feels. When we have a desire for something to happen in our lives, and we get tired of waiting, all too often, we try to take matters into our own hands because we’re sure we know the best way. All the while, the Lord watches, knowing He has a plan that will always lead to victory.

I’m encouraging you today, and myself, too, to take a step back and look at how tightly we’re gripping the dreams and desires of our hearts. Do we serve a God who wants to grant us those desires? Yes, absolutely. But, more than that, He wants his sons and daughters to have hearts that align with His will for their lives. I want to continue to live with hope for a future that includes the fulfillment of all the dreams the Lord has placed on my heart. I may have to wait longer than I would like, and I may even have to let go of some things that the Lord says aren’t His best for me. Regardless, while I’m waiting, I want to begin to engage more frequently in the practice of hoping, but not holding so tightly that I miss the beautiful and amazing plan God has for my life. (And, I’m hoping to begin making this a regular practice while watching Kentucky basketball games, too!). Join me, while hoping and waiting, as David reminds us in Psalm 13, to continue to sing to the Lord because He is always good.

1. Psalm 37:4. (2008). In NLT study Bible (p. 936). Carol Stream, IL: Tyndale House Pub.